Monday, October 29, 2007

Silent Luna

It's a first for me to have my own blog site and it feels quite scary and liberating all at the same time. I am not that kind of person who pours out everything of oneself to people, even if they are close to me, I still wanna keep something for myself. I refuse to let it all out because I'm afraid that I will be consumed to the very last drop of my sanity. So this is me trying to cross the border and hopefully I'll make it safe and sound.

I entitled this blog Silent Luna out of rush, because I can't seem to think of anything as catchy as this. Digging deep, I think I have been associated to this two words all my life that I feel this should be my tribute. When I was young and still innocent I am very shy and reserved. Never have I tried to act out of the norm. I just let myself drown in the crowd. Back then I remember that some of my classmates and teachers, even relatives, are complaining of how I am so soft spoken and silent all the time (carrie-esque). Many of my teachers always catch my attention for me to participate even if I looked like I lacked all the enthusiasm. A lot of people said this is because I am without a good foundation of confidence within me and I firmly believe this is so true. Now I don't know the reason why? and who to blame?, all I know is that the manifestations of all those years being so inferior is starting to kicks in. It is turning into a big bad-ass ball of guilt rolling towards me. So many regrets and so many what if's? Now I am here just waiting for it to roll over. This is the time to have it face to face, take a good look at it and say TA TA!!! (with british accent).