S.K.

Been watching a lot of video interviews of the man the myth the legend  Stephen King on youtube and its just awesome and ecstatic to know how brilliant he is. I can still remember the first time I saw Stand By Me and fell in love with it then when I found out he wrote it, I rushed to the bookstore placed my money and purchased the book. I laughed, cried and of course got scared the shit out of me while reading it. Now a few years later, after some hiatus and totally forgetting the majestic feeling of feeding one's imagination that is by reading, the bug has crawled back to set all that emotions into one familiar place. Am so proud to own again his collection of books and I'm quite excited where this ride will take me as I revisit old roads, thread new paths and go beyond the uncharted.

Thank you S.K.

The Stare

Does he notice that I was making a quick glances at him?

I only wish that he won't avert his eyes away from mine, once it's too hard

not to notice the elephant in the room. The thing is, I won't make any move 'cos

for me this is enough. An extra mile to be exerted is not something I am capable of.

What shall I do?

Again I pass a quick look and he's slowly becoming the only thing in my gaze.  Everything

around him seems to blur. My brains forming a lot of clouds that consisted of my imaginations

mixed with what I expect and the reality.

In the end, all that is left was the stare that will keep my hearts longing at bay.

Be kind... Rewind...

So after a long battle with what we call a writers block and a bit of laziness, here I am, up and about to put back to life once more this almost flat lined blog of meself. It has been a very long gap since I last posted something here. There were times that I totally forgot that I have a place to put all the things my brain couldn't handle and my hearts outburst that I couldn't sort out either. It feels like I woke up from a very long coma.

Now I have lots of ideas, comments, opinions and [definitely a very violent] reactions that will absolutely take over this side of the world wide web (hahaha!!! very 90's) but of course we need to do that one step at a time. Prepare yourself for it will be a very... very... very... exciting ride.

Kalayaan

Naglalakad sa kahabaan ng
Kalayaan ng biglang pumasok sa isip kong
Wala ka na...

Nag iisa at hindi alam
Kung san pupunta
hinahatak na lang ng iyong nakaraan...

Hinayaan na lang
Wala na bang paki-alam
Ngayon ako'y isang sugnay
Na kailan ma'y di makapag-iisa

Malaya na ba ako?
Malaya na ba sa'yo?

Malaya nga ba ako?
Malaya nga ba sa'yo?

Malaya pa ba ako?
Malaya pa ba sa'yo?


Nasobrahan o
Sadyang sapat lang ba?

-- I wrote this while walking the stretch of Kalayaan Ave. in diliman and thoughts of my frustrations about Freedom that a lot of people either take for granted or just ABUSE crept up my brain. It is unfinished but oh well.

Bottomless

051608

hmmm...

Fragile Love

I broke it... I tried to fix it up... but it's gone... all gone....

this pretty much was the concise version of my love story. I am not proud of what I did but I know a part of it was eventual and I got to a situation that I have to fast paced everything to spare myself of pain, not knowing along the speedway I will end up hurting not 1 but 2 hearts. And hurt I was.

He came to my life so irritatingly cliched. Started by a few messages thrown here and there to/from each others online profile and later on exchanged handphone numbers. Initially it was just ok, no extraordinary feelings being exerted. As days go by when we slowly noticed that our inbox were filled only with each others sweetnothings and sometimes senseless messages we decided not to procrastinate the obvious. I invited him to my place, he agreed and he told me that he was relieved by my gesture. I know some of you will be irked by this aggresive choice of actions (believe me I've met quite a few guys but I never sense any negativity about him... oh! ok maybe just a little). We murmured a few hi's and hello at first, well that was expected but eventually we shyed away from being shy and threw any inhibitions left. Right then and there we acted as if this was all too familiar to both of us. In a matter of time and some mysterious earth spins we clicked. We both shared stories and enthusiasm to each of it. Running out of things to talk about doesn't seem to float in the air that moment. The night seemed so long and even the silence of the world was so special that it became our shelter. We laid down, felt each others warmth, whispered sweet thoughts and surprisingly (well based on my standards) no lustful event ever occured that entire night...



to be continued.

Silent Luna

It's a first for me to have my own blog site and it feels quite scary and liberating all at the same time. I am not that kind of person who pours out everything of oneself to people, even if they are close to me, I still wanna keep something for myself. I refuse to let it all out because I'm afraid that I will be consumed to the very last drop of my sanity. So this is me trying to cross the border and hopefully I'll make it safe and sound.

I entitled this blog Silent Luna out of rush, because I can't seem to think of anything as catchy as this. Digging deep, I think I have been associated to this two words all my life that I feel this should be my tribute. When I was young and still innocent I am very shy and reserved. Never have I tried to act out of the norm. I just let myself drown in the crowd. Back then I remember that some of my classmates and teachers, even relatives, are complaining of how I am so soft spoken and silent all the time (carrie-esque). Many of my teachers always catch my attention for me to participate even if I looked like I lacked all the enthusiasm. A lot of people said this is because I am without a good foundation of confidence within me and I firmly believe this is so true. Now I don't know the reason why? and who to blame?, all I know is that the manifestations of all those years being so inferior is starting to kicks in. It is turning into a big bad-ass ball of guilt rolling towards me. So many regrets and so many what if's? Now I am here just waiting for it to roll over. This is the time to have it face to face, take a good look at it and say TA TA!!! (with british accent).